by Noodle Since it’s been 100 degrees for the last (dog) year, now is a good time to talk about swimming. I have noticed people attempting to swim many different ways, including on their back and by constantly going underwater. I have also heard that people are so stupid they can’t just jump in the pool, [...]
Entries Tagged as ‘The Occasional Noodle’
June 25, 2010
Crazed Sex Poodles Would be a Great Name for a Band
by Noodle Today news broke that in the case of Al Gore vs. the Slightly Wacky Masseuse, our former Vice President has been accused of acting like a “crazed sex poodle”. While I greatly admire Mr. Gore’s invention of the Internet and our shared passion for Mother Earth, I have no choice but to express offense at this comparison. One [...]
June 4, 2010
Small Dog, Big Heart
by Noodle Yesterday the vet revealed that my weight has plummeted from 9.3 lbs to 8.8 lbs. You would think that a 5% decrease in body mass would give my owner a clue – but, no, all she could muster was some lame joke about me wanting to look good on the beach this summer. [...]
April 27, 2010
My Report Card
by Noodle Of note: I was forced to go to doggie “camp” today – a.k.a. my owners had better things to do than love me. However, my counselor did give me a decent report – and my owners even pretended that her remarks about my out-of-control jumping ability were meant to be a compliment, so [...]
March 22, 2010
Important news about the windows
By Noodle I’m happy to say that the season has finally changed from windows down to windows up. This is a very important development, because during the four hours I’m not sleeping, I spend a lot of my time staring out the window. It has been a long, tortuous five months of windows down. There [...]
February 22, 2010
Finally, a dog park I can recommend
By Noodle There are many things about North Carolina that I like more than New York City. For instance, grass. Also, the apartments are bigger, so there are more places to hide the things I steal from my owners. But one big issue I’m having is the other dogs. In New York they’re mainly toy breeds [...]
December 9, 2009
My first review
By Noodle I give the torture den that is our neighborhood Animal Hospital zero paws out of five. Sure, there are many treats when you first walk in, but do not be fooled. There was this woman who I did nothing to — I did not steal her socks, or her pen, or even her [...]
December 7, 2009
It’s a Dog’s Life
We’re going away for part of winter break this year, and this is the rigorous daily schedule at the place where Noodle gets to hang out: 6:30 a.m.: Food! Glorious food! 7:00 a.m.: Checking out the playground equipment. 12:00: Well-deserved napping. 2:00: Energetic romping. 7:30: More food! 8:00: Relatively chill romping, in preparation for blanket [...]
November 14, 2009
The Many Faces of Noodle Gutmann
Unfortunately, most conversations with our erstwhile blog readers go something like this: Us: “Have you read our blog lately, family member or loved one?” Family Member or Loved One: “You should post more pictures of Noodle.” Since we know the Noodle-lovers aren’t in it for the content, we’ve opted for a multimedia display. And if [...]
October 23, 2009
Extra, Extra: Small Poodle Turns Owners’ Brains to Mush
Another busy day for Noodle the Poodle:
Laura
Harold
